Wait for someone who will gaze upon the tapestry of your life and love the creator.
We all have a magnificent capacity to experience our humanity through intimacy, and through the building of intimate relationships. This can only happen authentically through the revealing of one’s soul to another.
And what is the soul, but that limitless plane within us where we experience our deep inner knowing, our deepest longings, our most memorable joys and sorrows?
And what is a soul mate but a person whom we invite onto that plane?
In August 2013, I moved into a room in a house in northeast Austin, and amongst the pile of few things left by the previous tenant, I found a book called Soul Mates: Honoring the Mysteries of Love and Relationship by Thomas Moore. I was struck by the author’s description of the word intimacy, meaning “profoundly interior”.
“It comes from the superlative form of the Latin word inter, meaning ‘within.’ It could be translated ‘within-est,’ or ‘most within.’ In our intimate relationships, the ‘most within’ dimensions of ourselves and the others are engaged.”
Many of us shy away (even run away) from intimacy, though it’s the one thing many—if not all—of us crave.
Why wouldn’t we? We experience ourselves through one another.
My presence is a reflection of your presence.
My acknowledgement of you affirms your existence.
Or, it ought to.
We are in an intimacy crisis. Many people find false solace in things other than their relationships with themselves and others, and yet, relationships have been necessary for our growth as a human species.
Friendship, partnership, and community have been integral.
So what do we do when we have people in our lives with whom we cannot seem to develop that intimacy we so crave?
We simply choose to weave the tapestry of our own gifts, talents, and destiny. No one but our selves can do such a thing.
We may have people who come along and rip our tapestry to shreds, or tell us how it should be woven, or that we may as well stop weaving.
We may have people who take us away completely from our tapestry, and we may leave it abandoned for a while—waiting for us and our hands to get back to it.
We may have people who think our tapestry ugly, meaningless, strange, or silly. They may think it too loud, too colourful, too simple. They may tell us that it will never be good enough. They may call our weaving crazy, or our vision impossible.
But you’ve made the choice, and the choice is yours alone.
As you do, you will attract into your life those someones who will admire your great work of art. You will find those who see in each and every thread the dedication you have to yourself, and to weaving a gorgeous tapestry of your own design, colour, size, and taste.
We all deserve to wake up to our own ability and personal responsibility to weave.
And we deserve those someones—those soul mates—who will gaze upon the tapestry of our lives, and love the creator.
(featured image by denise carbonell)